Déjà vu

There were times 

when everything felt so unsure 

and the other time it felt so certain

I didn't know 

how everything felt close 

yet distant– 

whether it was a real beginning 

or more as though remembering 

some sort of Déjà vu

I believed and didn't believe

because not all paths join

We know too well
that a situation

could change one's mind

However, 

every whisper 

brings me closer 

to a long list 

of impossible conclusions

Sometimes I thought
as if I have given so much
to things that
weren't worth 

my time, 

but,

who am I to blame?